Thursday, September 15, 2011
Making Good Memories-Part 2
As I write for this blog, I am not writing out of my expertise. I am by no means an expert in parenting or in homeschooling. I write to you about what I have learned or am learning. One day you will pass along what you are learning as a mom or dad and homeschooling parent to somebody else that needs encouragement.
In an earlier post, I started talking about making good memories. It is so important to make good memories with your children. I don’t remember everything from when I was a little. I think I started remembering more the older I got. I am not sure why that is. It would make an interesting study to find out why our memories became more detailed the older we get. In my last post I talked about the importance of making good memories since we, as homeschooling parents, are with our children all day long, and have the greatest potential for impact.
In the first post about making good memories, I talked about: 1) Don’t sweat the small stuff. 2) Laugh a lot. 3) Hug and Kiss your children. The next three ways I believe you can ensure you make good memories are:
4. Discipline them
This is a very touchy subject. Everybody has an opinion about this and about how to effectively discipline your children. I believe that discipline does not mean so much punishment as to “train” or “disciple.” The Bible commends us to train our children. There has to be an element of correction in the training, because children don’t always do or even know to do the right thing. I believe the response to negative behavior in children should be appropriate for their age, and we should teach them what God says for us to do, because training in Godliness is profitable. I am careful to be ever-conscious that every thing I do in training my children must be done in love. Recently I read a super post about anger vs. grace. This article would actual fall under my point #1 about not sweating the small stuff, but I think it fits here too.
5. Make your children feel safe.
I always want my children to feel safe. I always want them to feel like I will always be there for them to protect them and not let harm come to them. One example of how I might protect them is from EACH OTHER! OYE! In a household where you have a lot of children, there are lots of opportunities for fighting. I don’t ever want one child to feel as though it okay for another to hurt them, so I try to solve issues that arrive in such a way that the injured child feels safe. In the Bible, there are many stories of sibling rivalry. One story that stands out is in the Old Testament, the story of Joseph and his brothers. Jacob favored Joseph above his brothers A LOT. This created great strife in their family so much that the brothers threw Joseph in a well, then sold him to slave traders, and told his father he was dead. Now, I know this account ends in the favor of the Hebrews, but it was horrible for Joseph and his brothers while it was taking place. What could God have done had the strife not been present?
6. Do things your children like.
As adults, we have many interests and desires. We like to go shopping, and to the movies, and maybe hiking, or to a museum. But what does your child want to do? One great way to communicate love and make wonderful memories is do something fun that your children like to do. Maybe they like video games so you can take them to Chuck E. Cheese. If you go to the movies, let them choose, age appropriate of course. Take them to Toy’s R Us once in a while. One night for dinner I gave my kids chocolate mint ice cream in a cone! Now, I know that is not highly nutritious, but I am hoping that fun night is etched in their memory as the great night mom gave us some ice cream. Another family outing that takes place frequently is going out for pizza. My children love pizza! Now, my husband and I have lost our taste for pizza at this point, but because it is something they love, we still do it.
Making good memories is so important to your children. I believe it will make them more secure people, confident in who they are, and secure in your love which will help them as adults fulfill their purpose in history, God’s great story.
So, I have given you a small list of how you can memories with your children. What are some of other ways to make memories you can think of?
Please make sure to check back because there will be more upcoming posts on making memories as part of our early morning routine and at bedtime. Later on I will discuss what to do with all these memories once you have made them!